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Carl + Carl

by: Leif Haven

The Klansman was in the trunk
of my ‘93 Chevy Caprice,
and we weren’t even half way out of Memphis.
It was a great time to hide
a flask in your beard.

You were holding the baby in a papoose
I said, “Where’d you get that baby”
I said, “I can’t believe that Klansman
just climbed into the trunk and wouldn’t get out.”

My Caprice roars like a tired walrus
but it’s smooth sailing down the giant highways of the future.
I could hear the Klansman’s sing along:

I’ve got a trust fund life
I’ve got a trust fund life

We all sang:
I’m worth a billion in lies
With my torture porn,
Drive a G.T.O.,
In my uniform

The Klansman got out in Kansas City.
He said, “It’s time to change the sheets.”
I said, “Don’t let the trunk hit you on the way out.”

We rolled into Omaha on three wheels.
We all agreed it was a great trip across Mexico.
My blog was full of love, I Instagrammed with one hand
And crocheted with the other.

We settled into Omaha to
raise our miraculous child on our lifestyle blog
and wait for our publisher in white to arrive.